Okay, so I claimed RSB would return. Well, brilliantly, I managed to miss the first episode. However, I did bother to look up the highly publicized Zoe Alexander, as, well, her breakdown is pretty much the most extreme thing shown on The X Factor. Well, it wasn't really a breakdown. I assume Cowell has been hanging around USA reality shows for too long and has decided everything should be scripted.
I think this is the one moment that I felt sorry for a contestant. Unless she is a drama student at the University of Emotional Torment, she was clearly shaken by the comments and seemed so incredibly angry at the producers. I strenuously believe she was exploited by the producers, and by extension the editors, of the show. She claims she was told to sing Pink, and Tulisa tries to shun that statement and fails, as she immediately claims that they didn't. As this audition was recorded many moons ago, any amount of editing could've been done to this clip. Televised, the judges seemed rational with their comments, but how do we know that was their genuine responses. Call me Mr. Cynical (which I'd appreciate; I've always wanted a proper nickname, and no, potato isn't a nickname, insider reference), but I don't think the show is as truthful as portrayed. Okay, so maybe that's not cynicism, that's just having a fucking brain.
There was also news that she was arrested, and unless this happened after her audition, as in, directly after, this is total and utter bollocks! That's right! BOLLOCKS! Is that highlighted enough for you? If someone is arrested for how they were portrayed on a pre-recorded TV show, then the policeman who decided to make the arrest is a wanker, and was probably the subject of this side-splittingly hilarious, classic joke.
"What did the policeman say to his tummy?"
You're under a vest.
Yes, the claim of hilarity was intentionally sarcastic. Anyway, back to ranting at twats. If you arrest someone for how they acted on a TV show, then you might as well arrest Tom Hardy for beating up Batman. For all we know, Tulisa threw a mug at Zoe Alexander (yes, I will use he full name every time) and called her the daughter of Satan and Osama bin Laden. Okay, so that statement implies Satan is female, but who gives a shit.
*sigh* Sometimes I really want to defend X Factor for livening up my Saturday nights, in a way that doesn't involve an unnamed console of some description (PS3), but sometimes the production makes me so angry that I want to punch a dog in the face with a garbage truck.
But I digress, I will try and get back on form next week. I'll be looking out for somebody that can sing quite well that hasn't got a exploitable relative with a terminal illness. Those are usually my favourites.
Oh, and I'd like to credit some people, who in all honesty wouldn't care if I fell off Ben Nevis. The first is the person that gave me the idea to do these blogs, Stuart Heritage. Follow this genius NOW. You may also notice, if you are a gamer, I write with the same mannerisms as Ben Croshaw without being funny. Here is his blog.
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