Sorry about the lack of the blog last week. I was too busy celebrating Janets exit. Let's run through the highlights quickly.
It was guilty Pleasures and Heroes week.
Little Mix did a rubbish first song.
Janet forgot her words, majorly, and was dreadful. Again.
Misha gave an alternative version of that Cyndi Lauper song, and it was passable.
Marcus did that Wham! song, and it was too samey.
Amelia did T'Pau, and among arguments, I still think it was better than song two.
Then was Heroes.
Little Mix did Beautiful, and it has been revealed the blonde one should be in the girls category, solo.
Janet did Red Hot Chili Peppers, made it her (probably) best performance, but was still not Live Show quality.
Misha B slipped in quality with Roberta Flack.
Marcus did an awful version of Lately.
Amelia did a Kelly Clarkson song, and it was her weakest. I see her doing this style as an artist, but probably with more power.
There was a 24 hour break.
The Muppets sang better than Olly Murs.
Jessie J did a Katy Perry.
They performed the charity single, with 10 seconds of JLS and One Direction.
The results were announced: Amelia, Marcus, Little Mix.
The final two was Janet and Misha.
Janet chopped up and defecated on Chasing Cars.
Misha was wearing a Cottage Loaf and 1/30 of a chandilier.
Misha did a song nobody has heard of.
Janet went.
I wooped.
I went to sleep.
Then came this weeks performances. The genius team behind themes decided Motown was actually a good theme, even though motown is worse than it was in the 60s/70s. Basically, it's Marcus 'Woo! Let's Go!' Collins week. Louis does his lost spaniel impression, Tulisa has washed her arm, Kelly wore clothes and Gary is still 40 (wait, my dad is older than him?) going on 84.
IT'S TIME! TO KILL! THE MUSIC!
Kelly announces Misha 'I'm still in the competition, U Jelly Bro?' B. She might be good at Motown. As you will not know, she did Aretha Franklin in the audition. Aretha Franklin is the one Tulisa hasn't heard of. Come on Tulisa Constavalos (oh yeah, I spelt that without wikipedia), even I have heard of Aretha and I'm under 20.
Anyway, heres a group I've never heard of, Martha and the Vandellas. They did Dancing in the Street, Misha song. It was meh. Also, she had a stroke 5 seconds in to the song.
Amelia then did... oh. An actually OK Motown song? Whatever nesxt. Ain't No Mountain was the one she did. The original was about romance or something. Amelias was about being back after being booted out. Clevah or summat. Let's say it was better than Since U Been Gone. She should still do E.T and Piece of My Heart again. I have a feeling audition songs will be a theme, but since Little Mix were formed at Judges Houses, it may be a Judges Houses theme. Even better!
I'm getting off track. Next up was Little Mix/Little Muffins/Lital Micks. Basically, the good singer wasn't used and the Rihanna one muffed up her words. I have a feeling they are slipping down in the odds to win.
Marcus 'Woo! Let's Go!' Collins came and sung My Girl. Even though he is gay. *gasp* Sexualityception! Yeah, he cant sing very well can he? Also, he was stationary, which removed his entertainmentness. He's now my least favourite.
THEN CAME ANOTHER SET OF SONGS! THEN CAME A REDuction in letter size.
Misha returned with Perfect by P!nk. That song is actually called Fuckin' Perfect, a sung biography of Misha B's weeks. She sung this because the song 'I Am Not A Bully, I Already Told You That. Leave Me Alone.' couldn't have the rights secured. Her best rap was in it though. Probably 'cause it wasn't sung in the style of a stoned Nicki Minaj. The other parts were too Bottom Two Ballady though.
Amelia then returned with another power ballad, and yeah, it was a powerful vocal performance. Still doesn't top The Show Must Go On, but it's a yes from me. FYI, if Misha didn't do P!nk, Amelia could have done Family Portrait. That's another missed trick, aside from Kitty not doing Born This Way a couple of weeks back.
Then it was Littl... wait... Marcus 'Woo! Let's Go!' Collins? Whatever. His worst performance since Moves Like Jagger. Please go Marcus. Please.
Then came Little Mix. They did a song that the blonde one did more in. It basically proved that the other three are shite. Also, Beyonce is still awful.
Marcus to go, he will never be any good. Ever. Again.
SUNDAY TIME!
The group performance returns, and it isn't the crappy charity song. Thankfully, it is a Wilson Phillips song. Too bad it is still mimed. And rubbish.
The it was that little prick. I nearly through my skittles at the TV, but I realized wasting Skittles on him was like wasting toast with margerine, or tea with sweeteners. He also stole JLS's lamps.
Then was Kelly Rowland, who did a performance weaker than most of the finalists could do. Except Jonjo. And Frankie. And Janet. And for now, Marcus. At least she sung live.
Lolresultstime. Rule of thumb for The X Factor. If you were in the Bottom Two the week before, you're announced first.
The first act through... Little Mix. That means Misha is going home.
The next going through is... Marcus. That better mean Misha is going home.
The final act going through... Amelia. That means Misha is gone.
Then Misha did a rap including Dermots name, and then sung Who You Are again. FYI Misha, it was better than Marcus.
So, the final next week! At Wembley! No, not the stadium. You cant put The X Factor in the same place as Muse. Gawd. I actually have the small feeling that Amelia will win it. With thorough research (or, looking through videos of the performances), I have discovered that A) Marcus isn't liked as much anymore. B) Amelia is getting more likes that both of them. C) Marcus is the second person in the final five to get more dislikes that likes on a video.
Little Mix were savaged by the judges on their first song, so that means they are definitely slipping, and Marcus is getting genuine dislike. Amelia is still being accused of being shouty, but the range she needs to tone is her soft vocals, her belting is fine!
So yeah, Amelia might completely rub it in Kellys face by winning. That will be awesome. See you next week, where I will be celebrating or weeping!
Final Note: I have realized I talk about Amelia way too much in these posts. As she is my favourite, it's applicable. I'm not biased though. Come on. I even sort of complimented Misha. I will promise next week Amelia praise will be toned down. Unless she wins. Then there will be a blog about how she should of won and why she is the best singer in the competition.
I'm turning in to that pink guy... christ.
Another Final Note: As the christmas holidays are coming, and X Factor is over, I am doing a week by week redesign with ALL contestants giving them songs that they would do the best with in terms of how good they are. That will be fun fun fun.
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